PERSONAL NOTE

Well, the CEA annual conference in Irvine was great and always fun to reconnect with people I may only see once a year. So, November, you say, what's up with Jan in November.  Well, on the 22nd I will be participating in a Mud Girl Run in North San Diego County.  I have always thought this would be a fun thing to do, reminiscent of my youth and playing in mud puddles.  I'm sure that having short hair will be beneficial at this event.  I'll share some pictures later.  It should be lots of fun.  For the benefit of my younger readers, you can still do a lot of fun and silly things even in your seventies.

ARTICLE

The Power of Belonging

As the holidays approach, we often focus on gratitude — and rightfully so. But this year, I’ve been thinking about something that goes hand in hand with gratitude: belonging.

Belonging is that deep sense of connection that reminds you that you're part of something bigger than yourself. It doesn’t depend on the size of your family, the number of friends you have, or how many invitations you get this season. Belonging is about knowing that you matter — that you’re seen, valued, and appreciated for who you are.

For some, belonging looks like laughter around a crowded table. For others, it might be a quiet conversation with one trusted friend, a friendly neighbor waving hello, or even a pet who’s always happy to see you (Charlie approves of that one). It’s less about headcount and more about heartcount.

When you feel that sense of connection, your stress softens. Your perspective shifts. Life’s challenges feel a little less heavy because you know you’re not carrying them alone.

If you’re surrounded by people this season (family, friends, coworkers):

• Practice presence over performance. Put the phone face-down, make real eye contact, and let the conversation breathe. Ask one deeper question like, “What’s been meaningful for you this year?”
• Notice and name the good. Offer a specific appreciation to each person you interact with (“I really value how you always bring humor to tough days”).
• Create mini-moments of belonging. Invite the quieter person in, save a seat, split into smaller groups for a walk or game — make space where everyone can be seen.

If you’re short on connections right now (or new to a city):

• Reach out to an organization to fill the gap while you create individual connections— think of a volunteer shift, a local class, a faith or service group, a hobby club, or a meetup group with shared interests.
• Choose one consistent place (same coffee shop, library, or neighborhood) and show up weekly; familiarity builds gentle rapport.
• Start with micro-belonging. A genuine hello to a neighbor, a kind chat with a cashier, or a short note to someone you admire can be the first thread that becomes a lifeline.

Belonging rarely arrives in a grand gesture; it’s built in small, steady moments — the check-in text, the shared laugh, the “me too.” And here’s the beautiful twist: when you offer belonging to others, you strengthen it within yourself.

As you move through this season, take a moment to notice the people — or places — where you feel most at ease. Nurture those connections. And if you’re able to offer a sense of belonging to someone else, do it. A warm smile, a sincere “How are you really doing?” or a seat saved at the table might mean more than you’ll ever know.

Belonging isn’t about what you have — it’s about how you show up. And showing up, with heart, is something each of us can do today. 

QUOTE FOR THE MONTH

“The smallest circle of belonging can still hold a whole heart.” — Jan Cerasaro

UPCOMING EVENTS

I'm developing a 12-week group coaching program launching in January.  More info.  to follow.

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Stay safe, healthy, and happy!

Coach Jan